Taking on other's pain

So yesterday my SIL found out that her grandma was going to be taken off all machines that were keeping her alive and pass on into the next world.  All of it was quite sudden.  Her grandma fell on Wednesday and had a cardiac arrest.  The paramedics brought her back and took her to the hospital where she was given a blessing.  Then they decided to cool her to 30 degrees Celsius for 24 hours, then warm her back up and see what damage was done.  They warmed her up by Friday, but the tests weren't showing any brain activity...so her 9 children and husband had a meeting where they decided to let her go.

Now what does this have to do with me?  Well I saw my SIL yesterday at a family reunion, she actually found out at the reunion since the meeting was at the beginning of the reunion.  I could tell she was hurting, I could tell she was trying really hard to have a good time and not think about it.  I gave her a hug and this might not make much sense, but it's almost like she gave me or maybe the better phrase is shared with me some of her emotions and I didn't even realize it.  Btw, I think hugs are pretty powerful and can leave one drained or energized.  So after the hug, I felt so grumpy.  I left the reunion with my 3 kids feeling more angry with them, etc.  I felt like I didn't have a good time at the reunion b/c my DH was sick and couldn't come.  Then I started thinking about all the fun I did have at the reunion (because I really did have a good time) and I thought why do I feel so yucky - dumb hormones.  And then I remembered the hug.  And I remembered what my emotional healer told me about not taking on other people's problems, but putting them on the table and letting them go.  I called my DH because that is one way that I let other people's problems go is I tell him about them, and that mostly helped!!:)  I felt so proud of myself for being able to recognize that I had taken on her emotions.  But I felt frustrated that I did too, because me feeling bad isn't going to stop her from feeling sad and grieving, in fact it isn't going to help her at all, it is only going to make me feel bad.  

I texted my emotional healer and one thing she said was to realize that it isn't my pain to feel, it is my SIL's and the Savior's.   Man I need to get better at empathizing, but not owning other people's problems!:)  The Savior has already suffered for all of our pains.  I love Alma 7:11-12 because it explains that role of the Savior's so well.  "And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.

And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities."  I can't ease their pain, only He can.  Instead of trying to take over Christ's role, I need to lead my family and friends to Him and show them that He really is there to ease their burdens and suffer what they suffer.  I can fulfill my role by "mourning with those that mourn" and "comforting those in need of comfort," allowing my light and love and Christ's light and love to strengthen them, but I do NOT need to take their pain.  Instead, I need to stand as an example of Christ and as His disciple "and let my light so shine so that when others see my good works they will glorify our Father in Heaven.