Finding Happiness

I don't know that this idea is fully developed, but I've been thinking about it a lot lately. It all started with a class in church - someone made the comment that your spouse can't make you happy. At first I disagreed, but as I've thought about it a lot more, I've come to the conclusion that happiness has to come from within. You have to look to God and yourself for true happiness and if you find it there then you will be happy no matter what. However, you should be happy in your marriage too, Being with someone so much allows you the opportunity to get to know your spouse very well. So you can pick out the things that will make them tick or you can focus on the things that make them happy and spend your time serving each other. My husband and I choose the latter; which creates happiness in our home. I know whenever I am sad that my husband can cheer me up and make me feel better. However, sometimes we have to ask God first (usually in those cases he gives me a blessing and it works wonders!!!:) I'm not exactly sure how to become happy, other than I know it is a choice. Several years ago I took an institute class and the teacher talked about Christ and how He chose to be happy. Our countenances our supposed to reflect Christ, which is a sacred responsibility. I know that Christ took time to "mourn with those that mourn" and He angrily cast people out of the temple, but He mostly spent His time in service and love to others and I have to believe that He was happy...filled with joy as we are meant to be. So I guess as we become more like Christ than we can find joy and be happy with our decisions, despite adversity and trials.

Answers within us

Why is it that when you stop looking for something you find it? It happens to me all the time...I finally decided to go on a mission and I met my husband (I never went on a mission), I give up looking for the remotes and then they show up, I buy a new pair of glasses and find my old ones. It seems that when you stop searching the truth is more easily accessible. Truth always comes out when I'm venting my problems to other people too, not always in their suggestions, but it seems to me that just the act of telling someone else what is going on helps me to figure out the solution. I've noticed the same things with friends who vent to me, not that my suggestions are helpful, but that in venting they come up with the solutions...sometimes it takes a few times to actually relate the details of your problem before the solution comes up, but it usually does. All this has led me to the conclusion that answers are within us. Once we stop searching then we are able to see what is right before us and the more we tell a problem the more we focus on it and then the answers will come. So what does that mean if all the answers are right before us? How is it possible to already know the solutions to our problems? In talking to a friend, she brought the answer clearly to my mind: Many of the prophets have seen our day -- Mormon, Nephi, Isaiah, etc. so if they were able to see our day and our problems and even see specific people (Jesus Christ, Columbus) why wouldn't we have been able to see our lives and what they could be like before we came to earth? And if we did, then somewhere inside of us is that knowledge, it is just blocked by a veil, but if we were able to cross through that veil, then we could find all the answers that we ever needed. However, it is not that simple. God works on a need to know basis. So we can only find the answers within in as it works with God's plan. Recently my husband listened to a talk on BYU and he told me that the person speaking told of his dilemma about grad school. The speaker said he had prayed about and never received a clear answer, and finally researched it out and decided that it was the best decision for him and went to grad school. Years later he looked back and saw how he was being led to the right answer without actually receiving it. We've recently encountered a similar problem, but as I've considered the options and I've talked about them with my husband it seems that the answer has been right before us. So trust in Heavenly Father, trust in your gut and know that as you make your decisions you are being guided by an unknown force...you.

Success and Failure

So I've recently learned a little about success and failure. I guess that it is human nature (and Satan's influence) to focus on our failures. I know someone who recently told me that they must be evil, because sometimes they do things they know are wrong. It is so easy to focus on all that we are doing wrong and how we are not meeting the goals that we set for ourselves...and pretty soon, why even work on those goals, since we are not having success with them anyway. But if we really want to be successful in our goals and in our lives, we must take time to celebrate our successes. For example if you ate 2 healthy meals this week, that is a success, yes ultimately you probably want to eat healthy meals all the time, but it is success. If you got to bed on time 3 times this week, that is better than you were doing before you made the goal...focus on that. It also helps to visualize what your life will be like when you have successfully met that goal. It is important when we take stock of all that we need to improve in our lives that we also take stock of all that we are doing good in our lives. It is important to have balance so that we are not always negative, or always failing to see negative.