God truly loves us All!!:)

Recently I was reading in 3 Nephi -- just after the destruction, but before Christ comes. I read this verse: Wo, wo, wo unto this people; wo unto the inhabitants of the whole earth except they shall repent; for the devil laugheth, and his angels rejoice, because of the slain of the fair sons and daughters of my people; and it is because of their iniquity and abominations that they are fallen! (9:2) It hit me. Some of the people who died were very very wicked. (For example, King Jacob - the leader of the Gadiaton robbers.) And yet Christ still calls them his "fair sons and daughters." As I read that I felt the love that our Savior has for all people, even those who choose to live wickedly. He really has such love for us!!

I continued to read and then came across this: And behold, that great city Moronihah have I covered with earth, and the inhabitants thereof, to hide their iniquities and their abominations from before my face, that the blood of the prophets and the saints shall not come any more unto me against them. (verse 5) I know that I have realized this before, but Christ really allowed the wicked people to die to save them from themselves. Christ did not want them to suffer any more than they absolutely had to. And he said this right after he had finished suffering for all mankind. I know that there are many different visions of how Christ is, but I know that he is the most loving, merciful god there is. He truly loves us, no matter what we do and he always provides a way for us to receive the least amount of punishment possible and to come back to him!!!

Nephi and the Plates

Recently my husband and I were reading Elder Bednar's talk in the recent Ensign. And something he said really struck me. "This pattern of revelation tends to be more common than rare and is evident in the experiences of Nephi as he tried several different approaches before successfully obtaining the plates of brass from Laban (see 1 Nephi 3–4). Ultimately, he was led by the Spirit to Jerusalem, “not knowing beforehand the things which [he] should do” (1 Nephi 4:6). And he did not learn how to build a ship of curious workmanship all at one time; rather, Nephi was shown by the Lord “from time to time after what manner [he] should work the timbers of the ship” (1 Nephi 18:1)." All of a sudden it hit me. If the Lord had told Nephi to go into the city and kill Laban the first time, there is no way that he would have done it. He HAD to have the prior experience to realize that it was really the only way. Ultimately this makes me feel better...so often I am doing something because it feels right, and it blows up in my face, and I wonder, did I understand wrong, what is going on, but sometimes we have to have experiences and trials to get us onto the right path. Especially raising my children, I feel like this is such a relief. Sometimes I do make mistakes, but if I can learn from them and eventually end up doing the right thing, then I am being successful!!:)

Funerals

So in the past few months I've been to two funerals, both for family. The first one was unexpected and very sad (she was only in her 50s) and at that point I decided that I did not ever want to speak at a funeral. Then my Grandpa died; it was expected he had been sick for about 7 months or so. Because I am his oldest grandchild I got the 'privilege' of speaking at his funeral. I did not want to do it, and add to that the fact that my uncle said I was representing all the grandchildren (ugh.) But I said yes anyway. They figured that I knew my Grandpa the best because I used to go visit all the time (however, most of that time was spent talking to my Grandma). But the good thing in all this is I actually enjoyed preparing for a talk. It forced me to remember things that I probably wouldn't have just remembered. And I tried to be mostly general in my memories so that my cousins would be able to remember similar things. I think it turned out nice and although my talk was the shortest (I've never been longwinded -ever) I think I did exactly what I needed to and I learned from it as well!!:) So if you ever want to really remember someone, plan a talk for their funeral:)

Trusting in the Lord

“After all that has been said and done, after he has led this people so long, do you not perceive that there is a lack of confidence in our God? Can you perceive it in yourselves? You may ask, ‘[Brother] Brigham, do you perceive it in yourself?’ I do, I can see that I yet lack confidence, to some extent, in him whom I trust.—Why? Because I have not the power, in consequence of that which the fall has brought upon me. …

“… Something rises up within me, at times[,] that measurably draws a dividing line between my interest and the interest of my Father in heaven; something that makes my interest and the interest of my Father in heaven not precisely one.

“I know that we should feel and understand, as far as possible, as far as fallen nature will let us, as far as we can get faith and knowledge to understand ourselves, that the interest of that God whom we serve is our interest, and that we have no other, neither in time nor in eternity.” (as quoted by D. Todd Christofferson, Ensign, April 2011)

I feel that in some areas of my life I am so willing to leave everything in God's hands and completely trust Him, but in other areas, it seems my faith and trust seem to always be lacking. For example my budget. Even though God has proven that we will make it through I find myself constantly doubting and worrying. 3 years ago I had no idea how we were going to financially live the last year of Chad's schooling. For the first year I knew we would be okay because of our savings, but I had no idea how we would make it the second year. However, Chad was able to make enough money working part time for us to not only survive, but thrive. We did so well that we were able to put 10% down on a house -for us quite the accomplishment. Yet here I am again, wondering how we are going to make it the next few years and put a lawn in and a fence and...

"And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin;

And yet I say unto you, that even Solomon, in all his glory, was not arrayed like one of these.

Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is cast into the oven, even so will he clothe you, if ye are not of little faith."

Mostly, I've just decided that I really need to work on my trust in God, trusting Him in all things. Knowing that He knows me better than I know me and He knows my needs better than I do.

Food

So what food is the best to eat? Is eating organic the best? Why can't I afford to eat healthy? I recently read in the Ensign this quote from President Kimball: "grow all the food that you feasibly can on your own property. Berry bushes, grapevines, fruit trees—plant them if your climate is right for their growth. Grow vegetables and eat them from your own yard. Even those residing in apartments or condominiums can generally grow a little food in pots and planters. Study the best methods of providing your own foods. Make your garden … neat and attractive as well as productive.” Then it dawned on me, God knew what would we would need and 45 years ago he told a prophet to counsel us to grow our own food, because that would be healthiest. There is so much processed food and food that is just no good for our bodies. If we all heeded this prophet's counsel and grew our own gardens we would be able to eat more healthy for a lot less. I'm still not sure what "healthy foods" look like. I have pretty much eliminated hydrogenated oils from our diets (but I don't enforce it when we go eat at someone else's house and I do occasionally splurge and don't read the ingredients list). And I am trying to eat healthier, but it seems like everywhere I look there is a different idea of what healthy means. I believe that part of this is because we are all made different and so our bodies need different things. I've seen diets that are tied to blood type, and that intrigues me, but I still am just not sure what to do for my family. A while ago I seriously considered trying to go all organic, but that just didn't seem right for my family, so I decided to just try to do what I thought was best for my family. I am really excited to be able to grow a garden, and part of that vision includes as many fruit trees as I can fit in my garden area. I've decided that it is only worth it to can fruit if you grow the fruit yourself, otherwise it is much more expensive. So I want an apple tree, a cherry tree, an apricot tree, a plum tree, a peach tree (maybe two, because I really love fresh peaches), and a pear tree...I'm excited to be able to grow fresh vegetables and use them, and freeze them. I'm excited to learn how to garden, because I really enjoy it!!! I'm also toying with the idea of creating a greenhouse, but we'll see how that goes. Most of all, I am excited to be able to eat as healthy as possible!!!:)