When Chad and I were first married, we waned to be "newlyweds" forever!!:) I remember anytime someone asked us how long we'd been married, we were just so giddy!!:) And then something changed, I don't know what, but people don't ask us how long we've been married anymore, we aren't young newlyweds anymore and I was feeling sorry for myself. Then I read Gift from the Sea, (I've already done a post on this amazing book) and now it makes sense why I can't be a newlywed anymore and why it is okay!!:) She compares it to shells on the beach, but I think it really is just stages of life. The newlywed stage is an amazing stage, full of new love and life, but it wasn't meant to last. The stage of life I am in right now is a trying stage, but if our marriages don't have trials, then how can we grow? We are building, building careers, families, raising children, busy. We are devoted to each other, even if our time isn't always spent together. I love this quote from the book, "Love is looking out together in the same direction, working outward." If our love isn't growing then it must be withering away. And I would say that my love is growing!!:) I definitely love DH more today than ever before!:) I love him for different reasons though, my love isn't just the infatuation, butterflies in the stomach love (although I have those too!:) I love him because he is so good to me, I love him because we sacrifice for each other, I love that he is so willing to serve me, but in turn I serve him too, we are equally yoked. I love him because of who he is, not just how he makes me feel!:)
Another great quote from the book, "we shouldn't judge our relationships on how they used to be." So I am now satisfied with my relationship!!:) I don't need to be a newlywed anymore, because I'm not and that is okay!!:) I'd rather have my relationship growing than withering away, because honestly nothing ever stays the same!
Sunday, May 25, 2014
Sunday, May 18, 2014
Cleaving
"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” (Genesis 2:24) I thought I had this scripture all figured out, but I was recently reminded to put my husband first!
I know that I am supposed to be part of this school group. I have prayed about it over and over and every time I think about it I just get a feeling that I am supposed to continue on with this school group. Well a few of them have read Skousen and are really big into the details of the Second Coming, many of which are not detailed (at least not to the point that they detail them in the scriputres). They are constantly talking about these events with such surety it is hard to not believe them. And I believe that they are all spiritual women, leaders even. DH however, has a hard time with all that they are saying. He wants the proof. (I've never been good with proofs, kind of ironic for a math major!!:)
So last week after classes and hearing all this information, I came home and talked to DH on the phone for lunch, and I just went on a rampage, a rampage I didn't even know I had inside. I chastised DH for not having an open heart and refusing to listen to what this group had to say. I asked him to open his heart more and pray about these things before declaring unequivocally that they were not true.
After our conversation I didn't feel super good, but I didn't realize it. I did however have this impression to call one of my amazing friends. I had no idea why I needed to call her, but I did!!:) So I talked to her for a bit, and she kept digging and all of a sudden all of the "trial" came out to her. She told me some of the exact same things that DH had said: stick to the basic doctrine, deep doctrine and speculations are not necessary for our salvation. She reminded me that I needed to talk with DH about the things that I learned and then we could study it out for ourselves and pray about it, but the decision that we come to is our decision and I need to support my husband in this. I need to cleave to him, not my friends.
It was so powerful and a good reminder what my place is. I know that when I start hearing all of these "prophecies" I start to worry that I still have so much to get ready and I am not at all ready, but this week, I've been reminded that I am doing what is right for me. A lot of these moms are farther down the path then me and the expectations for them are going to be different than the expectations for me.
Since heeding that advice, I have felt so much clearer and free!:) I am so glad for friends that give me the advice that I need (who are truly ministering angels!!:), and especially for a Heavenly Father who knows me and what I need and inspires me to follow His path to fulfill my personal mission!!:)
I know that I am supposed to be part of this school group. I have prayed about it over and over and every time I think about it I just get a feeling that I am supposed to continue on with this school group. Well a few of them have read Skousen and are really big into the details of the Second Coming, many of which are not detailed (at least not to the point that they detail them in the scriputres). They are constantly talking about these events with such surety it is hard to not believe them. And I believe that they are all spiritual women, leaders even. DH however, has a hard time with all that they are saying. He wants the proof. (I've never been good with proofs, kind of ironic for a math major!!:)
So last week after classes and hearing all this information, I came home and talked to DH on the phone for lunch, and I just went on a rampage, a rampage I didn't even know I had inside. I chastised DH for not having an open heart and refusing to listen to what this group had to say. I asked him to open his heart more and pray about these things before declaring unequivocally that they were not true.
After our conversation I didn't feel super good, but I didn't realize it. I did however have this impression to call one of my amazing friends. I had no idea why I needed to call her, but I did!!:) So I talked to her for a bit, and she kept digging and all of a sudden all of the "trial" came out to her. She told me some of the exact same things that DH had said: stick to the basic doctrine, deep doctrine and speculations are not necessary for our salvation. She reminded me that I needed to talk with DH about the things that I learned and then we could study it out for ourselves and pray about it, but the decision that we come to is our decision and I need to support my husband in this. I need to cleave to him, not my friends.
It was so powerful and a good reminder what my place is. I know that when I start hearing all of these "prophecies" I start to worry that I still have so much to get ready and I am not at all ready, but this week, I've been reminded that I am doing what is right for me. A lot of these moms are farther down the path then me and the expectations for them are going to be different than the expectations for me.
Since heeding that advice, I have felt so much clearer and free!:) I am so glad for friends that give me the advice that I need (who are truly ministering angels!!:), and especially for a Heavenly Father who knows me and what I need and inspires me to follow His path to fulfill my personal mission!!:)
Thursday, May 8, 2014
Creating a House of Order
So back in Dec./Jan. I read this blog post on thepeacefulmom.com! She talks about creating a word for the year that you work on all year. I decided that I wanted to do this (at least this year) and the first phrase that popped into my head was: "house of order," so I wrote the scripture from D&C 88:119 on my marker board and have been working on creating a house of order.
My first thoughts were I needed to create order to our routine, so I have been working on that (although there is still much to work on, we have made progress!:). We sat down as a family for FHE and created some routines that we wanted to have. We also added order to our prayer routine, and since we have 5 members of our family and should say 5 prayers every day then we created a rotation so that everyone gets to say 1 prayer every day!!:) I love that since we started that there has been no whining or complaining about who gets to say the prayers!!:)
Then my thoughts went to organizing my house. I searched online for House of order, found some websites, started working on purging my house, but I haven't gotten very far (really, I've only cleaned my bedroom and the storage room downstairs really good), but I am making progress in that aspect too!!:)
So in doing those 2 things I would create a house of order, and since it is only May and I still have 7 1/2 months of the year left, I figured I was doing pretty good, until yesterday when I was reading my scriptures. I read in Moroni 9:18 that the people were "without order." That got me thinking, what does that phrase without order mean, does it have to do with righteousness? So I decided to look up "order" in Merriam Webster's free app dictionary and then in Noah Webster's 1828 dictionary. I learned so much!:)
First of all you have the normal definitions that I think of (I didn't write down all of the definitions, because I felt like some of them didn't apply to my desire to create a house of order): 1 - put in proper place 2- straightening so as to eliminate confusion (I like this reason for creating a house of order, to eliminate confusion!:) 3-setting in a relationship - wait, there can be order to my relationships, oh yeah, there should be, you have grandfather, father, son, that is an order to a relationship, but this can go a lot deeper! 4- gathering and arranging in preparation of a particular operation or effective use. Wow!:) I felt like I needed to create a house of order to help our family prepare for something big that is going to happen (although I have no idea what this "big" thing is!:) But this definition hit hard, creating a house of order is so much more important than creating routines and making sure your house is clean (even though these are included in it). It is making sure that your life is ready for whatever may come. It is making sure that everything has it's proper place. 5- arranging so that the whole works together-each part having a proper function. This definition is so important for creating a house of order. Everything has to work together and in order to do that, every family member must have a function and do their function correctly. 6- under religious rule. I liked that definition, I don't know that I need to change much for that one, but I like it!:) 7- state of peace, freedom from confused or unruly behavior; shouldn't that be our goal, peace.
From Noah's dictionary I didn't get much more, but I liked some of the definitions: 1- order is the life of business; good order is the foundation of all good things. 2-care 3-purpose
So I have some things to work on in creating my house of order, but I also have some direction!!:)
My first thoughts were I needed to create order to our routine, so I have been working on that (although there is still much to work on, we have made progress!:). We sat down as a family for FHE and created some routines that we wanted to have. We also added order to our prayer routine, and since we have 5 members of our family and should say 5 prayers every day then we created a rotation so that everyone gets to say 1 prayer every day!!:) I love that since we started that there has been no whining or complaining about who gets to say the prayers!!:)
Then my thoughts went to organizing my house. I searched online for House of order, found some websites, started working on purging my house, but I haven't gotten very far (really, I've only cleaned my bedroom and the storage room downstairs really good), but I am making progress in that aspect too!!:)
So in doing those 2 things I would create a house of order, and since it is only May and I still have 7 1/2 months of the year left, I figured I was doing pretty good, until yesterday when I was reading my scriptures. I read in Moroni 9:18 that the people were "without order." That got me thinking, what does that phrase without order mean, does it have to do with righteousness? So I decided to look up "order" in Merriam Webster's free app dictionary and then in Noah Webster's 1828 dictionary. I learned so much!:)
First of all you have the normal definitions that I think of (I didn't write down all of the definitions, because I felt like some of them didn't apply to my desire to create a house of order): 1 - put in proper place 2- straightening so as to eliminate confusion (I like this reason for creating a house of order, to eliminate confusion!:) 3-setting in a relationship - wait, there can be order to my relationships, oh yeah, there should be, you have grandfather, father, son, that is an order to a relationship, but this can go a lot deeper! 4- gathering and arranging in preparation of a particular operation or effective use. Wow!:) I felt like I needed to create a house of order to help our family prepare for something big that is going to happen (although I have no idea what this "big" thing is!:) But this definition hit hard, creating a house of order is so much more important than creating routines and making sure your house is clean (even though these are included in it). It is making sure that your life is ready for whatever may come. It is making sure that everything has it's proper place. 5- arranging so that the whole works together-each part having a proper function. This definition is so important for creating a house of order. Everything has to work together and in order to do that, every family member must have a function and do their function correctly. 6- under religious rule. I liked that definition, I don't know that I need to change much for that one, but I like it!:) 7- state of peace, freedom from confused or unruly behavior; shouldn't that be our goal, peace.
From Noah's dictionary I didn't get much more, but I liked some of the definitions: 1- order is the life of business; good order is the foundation of all good things. 2-care 3-purpose
So I have some things to work on in creating my house of order, but I also have some direction!!:)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Background
